Leadership Trends and Realities

Life is a Mirror

Robert Whipple, www.leadergrow .com

Philosophers through the ages have taught us that individuals attract the same energy they put out to the universe. If you think negative thoughts, then negativity will come back to you. If your outlook is positive and upbeat, that is how the world will approach you.

I am not a philosopher myself, but I subscribe to the simple wisdom that energy begets energy. I see applications for the theory especially helpful in the working environment. I have been having some discussions with students recently and would be interested in your comments in this forum.

Some people are constantly feeling besieged with problems coming at them from other people, who they say have bad attitudes. My take is that if what you see coming at you is other people that are sour, it is really a good time to take a long hard look in the mirror.

For some expanded thoughts on this topic, especially applied to the working world, see the following article.

We are all familiar with individuals at work, who constantly complain about the attitudes of other people. These depressing people can be a cancer in any organization, because they consistently lower the morale of other individuals. Of course, the irony is that these people are observing negativity in others, but really, it is just a reflection of their own negative thoughts and actions. They go around spreading gloom about others, when in fact, they are the perpetrators of the problem more than the other people.

I think it is fascinating to observe this phenomenon, and then ponder whether I am sometimes guilty of the same problem myself. When I get fed up with other people being negative, is it really just a reflection of something going on within me subconsciously? In other words, how can I determine if I am blameless? In fact, I am just as guilty as anyone else of observing negativity in others. It makes an interesting conundrum that appears to have no solution.

My challenge to you is to pause before observing negativity in other people long enough to ask yourself the question of whether it may be originating with you. That takes a lot of maturity, because it really is a lot easier to just complain about others.

We all know certain individuals who are world-class negative thinkers regardless of who they are with. I am not referring to the one-of-a-kind rotten apple in the barrel that everyone knows comes up on the negative side of things. Rather, I'm talking about a more generalized malaise where individuals observe most other people in a negative light.

It might be a healthy attitude when observing several people being negative to mentally say something like "I must be putting out a lot of negative energy today, because that's what I observe coming at me from others. Let me test the validity of that by putting on a more cheerful demeanor and see if it has a positive impact on the current environment." Who knows, you just might enjoy the benefit of seeing a lot more love and affection coming into your day.

Robert Whipple is CEO of Leadergrow, Inc. an organization dedicated to growing leaders. He can be reached at bwhipple@leadergrow.com. Website www.leadergrow.com   BLOG www.thetrustambassador.com He is author of the following books: The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals,  Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online, and Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind

Coach Talk: I want a GPS

Bob Craig

An easy-to-use GPS system is on the top of many people’s "Must Have" list. We want something easy-to-read, easy-to-understand and use. Something that talks nice to us with a pleasant voice and is patient when we make a wrong turn. And then doesn’t get all worked up when we make a mistake and it has to "re-calculate." Glows in the dark and we can customize it just to us. I want one that says “Good Morning, Bob” when I get in the car. And wouldn’t be cool if it complimented me once in awhile with “Nice job, Bob” for following directions so nicely or staying out of trouble. Consider this. You’re the GPS for your team, for your associates in the classroom, for your customers on the phone or in front of you. You’re their guide, a calm voice when there is trouble, and someone that can easily re-calculate all kinds of things. It’s what we do best, and it’s hard to replace you with a machine. Our job is to out-perform that GPS a hundred fold in the way we lead our teams, conduct our classes, and serve our customers. We all need a GPS. Be the best one you can be for those you support.  

When You are in Power, Are Those Around You Threatened?

Dana Theus, Principal, Magus Consulting

Sometimes when we begin to refine our understanding of power and consciously work to bring more of our own power to the fore in our lives, it creates discomfort with – or for – those close to us, including colleagues, employees, friends and even spouses and children. If others have become used to you giving your power away, when you take it back this can surprise them, and sometimes even threaten them. This can be true when you are granted external power as well, and those around you are not used to the new level of responsibility you now shoulder. As I launch into the Take Back Your Power series of blog posts, I think it’s important to acknowledge this dynamic and prepare for how to handle these situations.

First, it’s important to get comfortable with the idea that you deserve to be powerful, and you especially deserve to own your own personal power. A key characteristic of internal power is that it is an unlimited supply. When you take your own power back, you are not taking it away from others; however, you may be demanding that others rely more on their own internal power than they did before.

Power and sacrifice

Many of us – especially men and women who want to change the world – struggle with high expectations that make us starve ourselves in order to feed others. We become habitual “second-seaters” and feel guilty spending resources of any kind – money, time, attention, love, energy, thought – on ourselves. But when we deny ourselves our own internal power, we are not helping those around us to find theirs.

“Put your own oxygen mask on before you help others.”

Despite the tiny airline voice you hear in your head when you read those words, let them resonate deeply in you for a moment. Breath is the very substance of life. In an airline emergency, the experts who’ve studied survival patterns in life and death situations have realized that more people die if the most capable people in an emergency try to save everyone else before they protect themselves. They know that in crisis, the person who has the presence of mind to care for themselves can help save many more people if they ensure their own ability to breathe first. Such leaders may choose to sacrifice themselves, but if their first instinct is sacrifice, they die too early to help the most people. The lesson to me in this phrase is that if you’re in the habit of making sure you can breathe – deeply, fully and powerfully – then you help many more people and at such time you sacrifice something you care about, you do it  – not out of habit – but with the intention of a good outcome.

InPower is an unlimited supply

Although some people around you may not want you to believe it, you’re not hurting anyone by understanding and taking back your own power. If – in the past – you’ve given them permission to think that by giving up your power they can be more powerful, then realize it’s time to renegotiate your emotional agreement with them. Looking at your unconscious emotional agreements with them and consciously renegotiating them is a definite InPower skill. Use these uncomfortable relationship situations to develop even more of your personal power.

When you claim your power in ways that help others around you, many people may be surprised at first, but when they realize it’s not a competition or a tug-of-war, most of them will relax and many will look for ways to help you more in the future. By modelling personal power for them, you provide them the opportunity to step into more of it themselves.

The most powerful people surround themselves with others InPower. And together they can accomplish anything.

Your “Stop Doing” List

Robert Whipple, www.leadergrow .com

I am sure you have a “To Do” list from time to time.  Some people have a list of must do items every day. It is a great method of remaining focused on the highest priority activities.  It is rare to run into someone with a “Stop Doing” list. This is a paradigm that you can break if you put some effort into it. I think having a “Stop Doing” list in parallel with the “To Do” variety is extremely helpful. Here are some benefits:

Numbers Game

Most executives are in a perpetual state of overload. That is because in the pressure cooker of day to day activities, more items come onto the plate than can possibly be accomplished. If you doubt that, just take a look at your e-mail inbox. In every meeting there are new action items to be accomplished and precious little time to do them. It is a habitual problem that leads to burnout and even death due to stress. Executives watch the incoming activities closely trying to manage the load. The common refrain is “I have no time to deal with that now.” They often forget to cull out the non-essential things that take up their time. Anything taken off the plate is a reason to celebrate.

Modeling Prioritization

Executives who focus on stopping things show subordinates that time utilization needs to be managed from both ends. Leaders are used to making tough decisions with budgets and other resources, but they sometimes fail to see how their most precious resource (their own time) is being squandered. Those who manage time actively and vocally send a clear message to the entire organization that seconds really do count.

10 Tips to manage your “Stop Doing” List

1. Keep track of what you are doing. If you have a mechanism to actually see how your time is being spent, you can manage it better. I like to think of colors. When I am doing “green” things, it means I am using my time wisely. “Yellow” things have marginal value, and “red” items are really wasting my precious time.  Just keep looking for the color. It can be a kind of game as you sit in a meeting and watch the air turn from green to red before your eyes.
2. Delegate more! This has a dual benefit because often people are eager to help out if only given the chance. There is always some risk when delegating, but the benefits far outweigh the risks. Learn the skill of good delegation and press yourself to apply it more than you currently do.
3. Finish things. Don’t dabble in work. Be crisp with completing assignments so your inbox is clear for new items. When something is completed, celebrate for a second because you now have that off the plate.
4. Spend some brainstorming time with your inner circle cleaning house of useless activities.
5. Create a “Sacred Cow Pasture.”  This is a visual board where you post paradigms that have been broken where you no longer have to do what used to take up your time.  It is refreshing to fill up a “Sacred Cow Pasture.”  Everybody benefits!  For example it takes courage to admit we no longer need the quality report because our systems have reached a higher standard.  How about doing away with the “cost” meeting and substitute an efficient dashboard? The possibilities are endless.
6. Challenge everything. Try a zero based approach to your day where you come in as if you were a new employee. Ask “why am I doing this and what could be done to eliminate the need for it.”
7. Handle your time like a budget. Think of your task list as a fixed number of things – like say 50 things. In order to make room for a new activity, you must take at least one old activity off your prior list.
8. Reward people who bring up ideas for your “Stop Doing” list. If you reinforce this behavior, you not only help yourself, you help the entire organization because everyone will get the bug to eliminate marginal activities.
9. Go on a “Safari” to hunt down and kill at least 3 unnecessary activities.  It can be a fun activity once you get into it.
10. Go away! If you are not there to do things, they will get done just fine most of the time. Go out and visit some customers or attend a seminar for your own development.  While you are away, have an administrative person keep track of the things that you would have done if you were there. These are all items you can challenge in the future.

Your “Stop Doing” list is as important as your “To Do” list. Don’t neglect it.

Robert Whipple is CEO of Leadergrow, Inc. an organization dedicated to growing leaders. He can be reached at bwhipple@leadergrow.com. Website www.leadergrow.com BLOG www.thetrustambassador.com He is author of the following books: The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals, Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online, and Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind